"Justin vs. the Volcano"

      "Pacaya" is one of the world's largest currently active volcanoes.  Nestled in the high altitude mountain ranges of San Vincente Guatemala, "Pacaya" dominates the landscape and demands the attention and respect of not only it's annual visitors, but of the combined country as a whole.  This savagely majestic giant doubles as a platform for an awe inspiring adventure for those daring to come close, and a ticking time bomb that promises to go off again and again without warning casting high intensity havoc and destruction across Guatemala in it's near entirety.                                      

 

    .  Shortly before my arrival to Guatemala City "Pacaya" erupted fiercely spreading lava, smoke, and volcanic ash reaching far away from it's lofty home. Here you see the rooftop of "Hogar de La Roca" and the clean up effort to remove the volcanic ash which completely covered us and the entire city. Our ministry is over sixty miles away from volcano "Pacaya" yet we were still affected severely by its eruption.  There were of course deaths and injuries reported by those who were unfortunate enough to be near the volcano during the event.

 

      I visited the volcano alone.  Just getting to the hike site was an adventure in itself involving three buses and hitch-hiking through the first part of the mountain where there are still roads.

Normally I would be TERRIFIED to be in the back of a Guatemalan police truck, but this group was very friendly and a big help in getting me on my way up the mountain.

Before entering the trail leading in I had to check in at the office.  There I was informed that no one was permitted to enter the volcano alone and that I was obligated to hire a guide.  I did not want a guide at all.  I cherish my personal time, sometimes a little bit too much.  The last thing I wanted in that moment was to pay a stranger to walk with me for the next 4 hours or so, forced to make small talk in my broken Spanish all the way up the mountain unable to set my own pace or course.  I actually considered not going inside at all and one of the guides noticed and called me aside.  He told me to tell the lady at the desk I had agreed to the guide and then go ahead in alone.  It was dishonest and in no way proper missionary conduct, yet that is exactly what I did.

It takes about ninety minutes at a steady pace and steep incline through different  forests and gardens to reach the point where the base of the volcano itself is in view.  Being without a guide I was left with split decisions to make as the trails split off into different directions.  I found out later that I chose to travel on paths that had been closed for years.  As the fluorescent green vegetation that contrasted so smartly and sharply with the grey terrain began to dwindle down to twigs, I knew I was closing in on "Pacaya" herself.

Welcome to a weird and wonderful world......volcano country.

  

     Hauntingly serene and deliciously desolate, a scorched earth circus of twisted rocks and rolling hills continue on and on before me...an endless landscape.  I was struck right away by the absolute absence of life in the land of "Pacaya" as well as an encapsulating silence broken only with each step I took as burnt earth broke beneath me.  Before long a steady breeze established itself and made a rippling sound against my wind breaker, coupling with my crunching steps I now had my volcano searching soundtrack, and the only sounds my ears would hear for the next four hours.

Coming up to the volcano base using obscure trails brought me in at strange place. The  entire scene was so completely covered with clouds, fog, steam, and smoke that I had no idea where the volcano actually was.  There were multiple mountains surrounding me and for all I knew any one of them could have been the volcano.

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Without knowing where I was going I travelled through the clouds around the entire base of the volcano to the back side which is an extremely dangerous and forbidden area.  I continued exploring and enjoyed the afternoon as time quickly sped by at an almost alarmingly fast pace.

 

     Then came cause for real alarm.  Throughout the day I had become extremely obsessed with the idea of seeing  some actual flowing lava before I had left.  This obsession brought me to the backside of of the volcano and  half way up towards it's peak at least twice.  I found myself scaling a nearly 90 degree angle  volcano, all alone, with no equipment, and completely surrounded by dense fog.  As I got closer and closer to the top the wind grew colder and the sharp jagged rocks grew hotter.  What came next was was total darkness and a heavy rain storm which led me to slip down with a landslide of rocks and sand into a complete abyss of fog, rain, and shadows.  I literally could not see three feet in front of me and I had no idea where I was. What was worse than all that was the fact that it was almost five o'clock. The sun which was already completely hidden by clouds would be going down permanently soon, and I was lost and alone on top of an active volcano with night quickly approaching.

I have to admit that I panicked.  Fear gripped me and I even started running in different directions to try to find the way I had come in.. This was a bad idea because I only got further off course and I slipped and fell.  A broken ankle was the absolute last thing I needed.  So in this moment I prayed.  Nothing eloquent, just "God please help!"

     It was as if I was in a movie because a few desperate minutes after my prayer a strong wind came and blew the clouds and rain away.  I was left in a peaceful awe with my first clear view of where I had been for the last few hours, now under a bright warm setting sun.

 

     As i now walked confidently back to the trails I made out a tiny group of people that were probably a couple miles away.  They were on the tourist trail and were getting ready to leave.  All of the sudden some human company sounded like a terrific idea and i hastened to catch up with them.  There a guide told me that I had come from a forbidden part of the volcano where most deaths and injuries occur.  He also said that since the last eruption most of the volcano had eroded and was now impossible to scale without serious climbing gear, and that too was forbidden. So basically, i had almost died trying to accomplish a humanly impossible task.  After talking and taking this photo I scaled down the mountain in the company of my new friends defeated by "Pacaya" in that I never saw her summit or lava, however alive to fight another day and with a new appreciation and perspective from my experience.

 

     I Learned a lot from my experience at Pacaya.  There is a reason that God demands obedience from His children and it is always for the good of His children.  The Bible says that "The steps of the righteous are ordered."  I had stepped out of bounds when I misled the woman at the volcano office and with a real life metaphor of a storm in solitude, God swiftly reminded me what life is like for me apart form His perfect will.  Though it was only for mere moments, I felt a terror and helplessness on that volcano that I haven't experienced in over a year and a half.  
     I left for the volcano wanting things my way.  I wanted to be alone, yet maybe God had a plan for me to share His grace and love with the guide who was supposed to accompany me.  I wanted too see lava so bad that it drove me to near madness and almost to the point of no return.  The bottom line is that when things become just about what I want, it is hard for God to use me or direct my steps.  Sometimes, the things we want most for ourselves are the very things that will kill us in our pursuit or attainment of such things.  Wanting to see lava is in no way a "sin," yet my need to fulfill that desire almost killed me.  Often times, we think that because we want something so bad that we are meant to have it.  And if we only work hard enough, and sacrifice, and strive towards that goal we will eventually achieve the goal and happiness itself.  I encourage you today to take caution in what you are pursuing.  It may in itself not be a bad thing ,yet breaking down a door that God has intentionally closed to protect us is a most perilous task and wrought with severe consequences.  I implore you to take a moment and contemplate the goals you are pursuing.  Do you know if God has called you to this task?  If so He will bless your endeavors and although there may be struggles, when you run out of strength the wind will be on your back.  If not, you may find yourself on the back-side of a volcano all alone in a dark storm with absolutely no one to call on for help.